Have you ever wondered why men only live a few years, compared to some of the so-called "lower" animals? My mother's birds are going to outlive her by many years, maybe even decades. Even trees live several hundred and even thousands of years. Doesn't seem quite fair, does it? I used to say this, myself. When you think about it, how damn egotistical is that point of view? What makes us so special?
Let's just pretend that men routinely live 500 years, instead of 70 or 80. Tell me, what would you, yourself, do differently? Do you think that you'd spend more time with your family? You'd work less and play more? You'd go visit the aurora borealis or climb a mountain?I don't think so. I think you'd be living exactly how you are right now. Sitting in front of your computer, your TV, your desk. Putting off getting married, putting off visiting your grandmother, putting off going to school, putting off having children.
We all tell ourselves, "There's always time." It's tomorrow, next week, next month, next year. We tell ourselves - no, we LIE to ourselves that there is plenty of time to live our lives. Suddenly, we find out that we're too old to have children because we're well past our reproductive years. Or our bodies have broken down so much that we could never climb that mountain. Our eyesight has degraded to the point where we can't even appreciate the stars in the sky. All because we put off enjoying the pleasures life offers us.
"Fear is the mind killer." Dune
I'm sure at least some of this orginates with fear. Fear causes paralysis.
Which of your fears screw you up? Fear of growing up or growing old? Fear of disapproval? Fear of missing out on something? Something else?
Aha. Suddenly I realize my own fear: fear of failure.
"You do it to yourself, just you, and that's what really hurts." Radiohead
Excuses, excuses, excuses. That's what fears are. It's what we tell ourselves to keep ourselves stuck. Nobody does it to us; we do it to ourselves and we do an ingenious job of convincing ourselves that our problems are all external. We had nothing to do with either causing ourselves to be stuck or staying that way. It's the rich. It's the poor. It's the government. It's my health. It's my family situation. It's my age. It's my finances. It's the illegal immigrants. It's my this, it's my that, it's my -OH, SHUT UP.
It's your Own Damn Fault.
My mother called me out on this over Christmas dinner. Thank goodness she did, too. I had become so mired in my own bullshit that I couldn’t see the way out. I needed someone to slap some cold water in my face. I hope you have someone in your life that cares enough to do the same thing.
"Live, live, live!!!"
Rosalind Russell as Auntie Mame
Artists have been saying this for ages in books, movies, and other media: Get up and live!
There is a book for young adults, called "Tuck Everlasting". In it, the female protagonist has the opportunity to become immortal. One of the already immortal characters tells her this: "It isn't death that you should be afraid of. What you should fear is the life not fully lived." (My paraphrase. Italics mine.) In the end, she chooses to remain mortal.
"A life lived in fear is a life only half-lived." Strictly Ballroom
In the movie adaptation of "The Lord of The Rings", Elrond's daughter, Arwen, had to make this same decision. Would she continue in the way of the Elves, immortal and aloof, living as children without concern for time, and, ultimately, living meaningless lives? Or would she choose to love who she would love, even if it meant she was calling down her own doom upon herself?
"I choose a mortal life," she says to her beloved. You go, girl.
One final example. Harry Potter, in “The Sorcerer’s Stone”, finds the Mirror of Erised, which J.K. Rowling used as a metaphor for television. It shows the viewer their deepest and most desperate desires. Dumbledore explains to Harry that the Mirror “holds neither knowledge or truth” and that men had “wasted away in front of it, even gone mad”. He ends his speech with wise advice: “It does not do to dwell on dreams ... and forget to live.”
"Give me hope, help to cope with this heavy load, trying to touch and reach you with heart and soul."
George Harrison
Maybe you have a lack of faith in the future of mankind. I can relate, believe me. With all the problems we have, who wouldn’t be having a crisis of faith?
Don't complicate it. It's just another form of self-sabotage.
Did you know that there are some professions that create with a view to the future and save not a sip for the present or the past? The one I’m thinking of in particular is winemaking. There are some wines being bottled today that won't be ready for 40 years. The people who will enjoy the wine bottled this last season are only being born today.
Consider this animated story I found on YouTube. It’s in three parts and each segment is about ten minutes long. It's a Canadian program called "The Man Who Planted Trees".
If you have children, this is a must-see for them.
The man in this story grew an entire forest without thought of fame or fortune. He had faith in his mission and took small, steady, consistent actions every single day of his life. The result is that countless numbers of people benefitted from his generosity of spirit.
"If you don't find a purpose for your own life, someone else will gladly make one for you." Anonymous
Are you just wasting air and food? Does your life mean anything - anything at all? Mao Tse Tung, the deceased leader of Communist China, is credited with saying to an aide: "It is of no benefit for that man to live and it is no loss if he dies." In other words, Mao declared someone to be a worthless person. What can be said about your life?
It's not the length of the life you have that's important. It's what you did with it while you had it.
"I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying.
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance to live like you were dyin'."
Tim McGraw
Now, go plant a tree.
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